Hello Dolls,
In my latest video, I share with you some of the lessons that I learned in my 1st year of being a newlywed. These are lessons, turned into tips for you if you are in your 1st year, engaged or a newlywed. From trials & errors, I know we can learn from each other and ultimately rely on God for guidance.
I have a bonus tip for you, but be sure to get the first 4 tips is in my video, "The BIGGEST Lessons I Learned My 1st Year of Marriage".
What I learned My 1st Year of Marriage
Tip #5.
You have to work on yourself.
In order to continue a healthy marriage with your husband, you have to better yourself. This may mean you have to work on your insecurities, past traumas, your spiritual struggles, self-control, past hurtful situations, your ability to forgive, your temper, the list goes on.
The reason why I married at 21 is because I knew who I was in Christ. That means something, I'm still growing into adulthood, maybe I'll find myself' later on in life, but I know who I am in Christ. I knew who I'm called to me to my family, friends and strangers. I knew what scripture says about sin and I had an understanding of the effects of it in my life and others. Through Him, I had a solid level of self-awareness.
So as a married Christian woman, I realized that my personal struggles had an effect on my marriage. My past negative experiences, that I had not yet dealt with emotionally, had an effect on my choices and actions I made in my marriage. My personal insecurities, that I had yet to pinpoint and acknowledge, crept itself out and showed itself in my marriage.
When you choose to ignore your inner struggles, it will make an appearance in some way, shape or form in your marriage. It may affect your marriage by impacting your actions, choice of words or decisions. It could also put your relationship in an unhealthy state.
Go through those unspeakable times or events that has impacted you in some way. Be self-aware about your mistakes or poor choices you have made. Talk to someone about it. Your husband isn't in charge of handling all of your internal problems, so try not to put too much pressure on him. I find it comforting to talk to my husband about some issues and speak to my mom about some others. Joining a Life group, going to counseling or therapy, maybe better suited for you, so be open and find something that works. That is what it means to 'Work on Yourself'.
By working on yourself and improving yourself, you'll be able to communicate and interact in a better way with your husband, especially in hard times.
I've personally recognized a change in the way I react to things and how I choose to make decisions and submit to my husband.
Dolls, be sure to get the other tips in my video! I know they will be a great help and reminder to us all.
What did you learn in your 1st year of marriage?
Whats a great lesson that you've learned in all of your years of marriage?
Comment Below &
Let's Chat Dolls!
Wow, thank you so much for this information ❤️
Oh my goodness Ebony! The wisdom you have! 💕 This is the best tip. I’m 37 and working on myself every day. Our first year of marriage I learned that it was okay to depend on and need my husband. That was a tough lesson. 😂 Biggest lesson… trust him and God enough to submit to him AS IF UNTO THE LORD. It’s a struggle, but I speak, “I submit to ______, as if unto the Lord:”throughout the day and it helps.
Such a great tip girly! It's something I also struggled with but have been working on. Life is way better for me now, and I'm less stressed about things that don't even matter.